...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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