ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
