I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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