dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
