i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
All the doctor said was why
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
