we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
