He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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