I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
