i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
