Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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