Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
