i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
