So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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