I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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