my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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