She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
two words: eviction party
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Randomize
