Ambien. No doubt about it.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
home. puking in laundry basket.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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