one word: firstdatebathroomanal
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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