exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
