He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
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