I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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