best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
