She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
