don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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