Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize
