we have pet lesbian snakes
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Randomize
