The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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