Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
