He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
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