that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
Randomize
