420 ftw
he wants to bone in the snuggie
are you so shy because you have an std?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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