I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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