too bad you live with your parents still
i just had sex bonerless
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
