Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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