I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
COCAINE IS GR8
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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