So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
