why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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