Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
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