I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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