you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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