eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I want her autograph on my taint
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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