Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
