so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
