Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
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