i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
