I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
