A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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