you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
