Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
