I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Randomize